Facebook Comments

For some reason I found this on my computer: a really long Facebook comment for Jennifer C-rd-n. Maybe I'm the only one that found it funny:

Dear Jennifer,

I maybe should start over again in a more serious tone, since this IS a very IMPORTANT matter. (Hence Facebook)

DEAR "SISTER IN CHRIST": (well I certainly hope so)

You have been wearing very immodest clothes. It is not that you are wearing anything revealing, but I would go as far as to say that your clothes are, well, SUGGESTIVE. It has been recently duly notes that the color red is one of expressive sexual tension. Therefore by wearing red, you have been suggestive in your mannnerisms and I am sure that you have probably wreaked enough damage. Two particular ways in which I have observed you being suggestive is when you wear your Maryland Terps Shirt after hours (which is shocking red), and when you wear your so-called "patriotic" combo - you know what I am talking about- your Anne Taylor jean jumper and long sleeve RED blouse. This goes clearly against Scriptural teachings!

Isaiah 1:18 says, “Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord: though your sins are like SCARLET (which is another word for RED), they shall be as white as snow; though they are RED like crimson (yet another word for RED), they shall become like wool.

Wearing RED is not only SUGGESTIVE but it is UNBIBLICAL. One can easily see that this passage calls us to wear things like WHITE, snow, and WOOL, and NOT RED, since wearing RED is also the color of an UNREGENERATE SOUL. PLEASE STOP WEARING RED. It confuses people and causes men women and children to stumble...

On another note of loving REBUKE, there are too many comments on your facebook page from the OPPOSITE SEX. This is probably due to your excessive wearage of RED and not because of your personality or amazingness.

HAPPY NEWS:
I just finished making this gorgious and stunningly embroidered baby cloth daiper for my hope chest, and I think you should do the same.

And an encouragement for you: As much as I see everyday how flawed you are, as in dressing suggestively, I would like to offer up some encouragement. To Jesus, you're like pink icing and gingerbread and roses mixed with sparkles! To him you are a PRECIOUS princess in Christ. To Him, your worth is SO far above rubies AND diamonds!

Jennifer dearest, you are very special in the sight of the ALL LOVING GOD, who loves even the worst sinners.

Please, dear, please, let me know when you are ready to apologize to me and the other ladies for your excessive usage of RED, which has attracted too much unwarranted attention from MEN. The fact that you have so many

Facebook comments from MEN is unbiblical in that it is unfair to the rest of us ladies, who occasionally receive one or two comments from membors of the OPPOSITE SEX. In Christ, we should all be equal. But how can that be, when you get more male attention on facebook?

-->Bible verses promoting EQUALity:
>Revelations 21:16 "The city lies foursquare; its length the same as its width. And he measured the city with his rod, 12,000 stadia. Its length and width and height are EQUAL."
>2 Corinthians 6:14 "Do not be unEQUALly yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"

Please do not be frightened by the time stamp on this comment. It is actually 10:00 AM where I am doing missions work in Communist China right now.

Your Loving Sister In Christ,
- Ioanna Lily Ann Cornett (last name pending change, by the grace of God)
PS: Embroidering "Sistahs" Until Heaven!